Engagement parties-really?

So, our little boy, Travis, got engaged and we have an engagement party to celebrate-the engagement. No, Travis isn't little. That's just a hangover from when he was a little boy. He is now 22, 6'3", and in college. He spent a beautiful year touring Saddam's home town of Tikrit. Nope, he's just a little boy in his parent's mind. But do we really need a party to celebrate him asking Tara, his wonderful fiance, to marry him? I think its a girl thing. Any reason to get together and do social stuff like that. There were pictures of the two of them when they were kids, pictures of the two of them when they were older, pictures of the two of them together, there were videos of the two of them, testimonials, lies, all types of things going on at this festival. Mother spent the day cleaning and nesting and I spent the day cooking, cutting the lawn, grooming the dog (my goal was to save $60 at Petsmart) and running to the store for the thirtieth time. The night went great but there were discoveries.

As clans have for centuries, the meeting of two families took place. My ancestors use to meet in the fields of the highlands in Scotland, swap some sheep, get drunk, and throw rocks at each other out of love and respect. We've come a short block from those good days. The Williams clan was drastically outnumbered by Tara's deep and wide family roots. She has cousins who have cousins-and she knows their names! Who the heck knows the names of their cousins' cousin? What is a cousin of a cousin? Do they get invited to the wedding? If they are invited, do they eat or is that limited to just the first line of cousins? When one is planning a wedding, money is an issue, the most expensive part is the food. Are there levels of eating? If your part of the immediate family, you get the whole enchilada. If you're second tier, like nephews or parents of the flower girl, you get cake only. If you are the cousin of the cousin, I think we should be able to limit you to whatever you bring from Burger King. I think that's fair.

Here's the problem, I don't come from a big family. Big families scare me. They're big. But what fun! Huge, gargantuan families of people whose names you never even begin to remember. Counsel to my little boy-just smile, nod, and say "It's good to see you again."